Things that go wee in the night

Midnight and I was researching some arcane area of popular culture on the internet. I heard the kids' bedroom door open and out stumbled Kai. Off to the loo or invading our bed: I thought.


Then I heard noises that didn't sound quite right. Dashing into the hall I saw that he was standing there having a hearty pee over the chair where I put my jacket and rucksack. He stumbled on to our bed and left me to mop up. Oh well, I was going to buy a new jacket anyway.

Sleepwalking I'd heard of. Sleep-peeing is a whole new dimension of nocturnal activity. Aargh!

Ms Gnomer

Whoever it was that coined the term "sleepover" is responsible for the one of the greatest misnomers in the language.

Kai's pal, Viktor, has just spent the night here and I can assure you that very little sleeping took place. Getting two excited boys off to bed last night took an eternity and this morning they were up at 5.00 am raring to go.

They spend the morning erecting an enormous Womble Burrow that used all our furniture and covered most of the living room!

Write on? Write off!

The reading and writing skills of a certain young man are a source of despair to us. Ask him to write dog, cat or cuddly bunny and he looks at you with a look of complete blankness.

Why is it then that once he gets on Youtube, he can effortlessly type NERF super-power sniper rifle, inter-continental ballistic missile and Toys of Mass Destruction?

I feel like the poor sap who got the gig as TEFL teacher to Attila and his barbarian hordes!