To be honest, Kai was never the greatest of conversationalists over the dinner table. One might though have got the occasional comment on an Attenborough documentary he had seen or a story about something that had happened at school.
Now however, since he got his Nintendo DS for Xmas, his only contribution to the family discourse is a long, rambling and totally incomprehensible rant about Super Mario Bros. This is usually delivered hopping around the kitchen like a kangaroo with an attention disorder. Ants in his pants! That boy cannot sit still for 10 seconds!
Yeah and Yoshi has to fight Bowser, yeah, and like he's got these power stars and Princess Toadstool, she's like, yeah,hidden on another level and like there's a secret passageway and it's really cool ,cos Mario's on this snow level wearing summer shoes and he's got a dongle pongle and,Scouser, yeah, his henchmen are all purple penguins and.....er well, you see, on that level Doshi is blue and yeah, he has to fight Noshi and then there are these exploding mushrooms and yeah, Luigi, he's got these explosive eggs, and yeah like Eivin has completed this banan and Mouser, yeah, he's got five keys and yeah .....
The only family member who is remotely interested in all this nonsense is Zoe. She adores her big brother and is quite convinced that anything he has to say must be of enormous interest. So she smiles and laughs encouragingly.
I just pull my hair out and curse Mr Nintendo!
This is the boy who used to tell us what a magnificent aviator of the airways the albatross was.
Now why on earth hasn't Sir David done a video game? Super Attenborough Bros? I'd buy it!
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